To Whom It May Not Occur That Upskirting Is Not OK:

I’ve been reading about your kind for years. I’ve never understood you. Latest example is this story out of Monmouth County about a ShopRite in Shrewsbury. Police say one of you was there following women around the store and using their cellphone to “upskirt.”

Taking photos surreptitiously from an angle beneath women’s clothing.

To what end? I want to just start cursing at you and calling you freaks. You know it’s illegal. That’s why they say you sorts meticulously plan your upskirt shots. Do you guys network? Is there some sick trading of tips and advice on the dark web?

So I know you know it’s a crime. What I don't know is why you do it. What great risk with such little reward. Are you so inexperienced that just the awkward, blurred shot of a woman’s underwear is going to do that much for you? I mean it’s not staged, it’s not posed, the lighting is bad, she’s reaching for a box of Triscuits, for crying out loud. What on Earth are you getting out of this awkward look?

Woman in leather mini skirt standing next to car

A real man would never take advantage of a woman. It takes an insecure coward to do so. But in this manner? Who are you guys?

I did some Googling. See if this sounds like you.

The average upskirter lives in isolation, very few if any friends, and is massively insecure and rather infantile. You're usually over 30 years old and had a morally repressive upbringing made to feel shame over anything sexual.

Just, wow. Pretty much what I thought. You must be so inexperienced that you view women like some other species entirely. Have you ever even talked to one?

I don't know if there's anyone creepier than you. All I know is I find what you do so disturbing that God help you if I ever catch you doing this. Sad thing is I'd likely spend more time in jail for breaking every bone in your pervy little "phone hand" than you would for upskirting.

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