Plastic straw ban? Suck on THIS, New Jersey! (Opinion)

I gotta be honest with you, I did it for the first time the other day and in the beginning it felt a little weird, but then I got used to it. More New Jersey restaurants, especially at the shore, are switching to paper straws for your beverages. After a couple of people at our table griped that things are getting a little ridiculous, I sheepishly admitted that it wasn't my first time. Yes, I can remember before the explosion of plastic products decades ago, straws were made of thicker paper.

The new ones almost have the smoother feel of plastic, but they're a bit wider and not as slick as those bird killing, environmentally damaging, fish destroying, evil plastic ones we've all become accustomed to. I don't know if it will make a dramatic impact on the environment or wildlife, but it sure will make the secular progressives among us feel better.

Better about the planet, well yeah, a little. But more importantly, better about themselves. That their googling, then squawking and preaching to the rest of us lazy, uninformed, unwashed masses, has finally paid off. Since society has gotten far less religious than a generation or two ago, people need to replace their faith and passion with something. It's a totally normal human trait.

So regular attendance at religious services and strict adherence to dogma and strict rules of scripture have been replaced with worshiping the environment, animals, themselves (social media), political ideology or any number of virtue signaling activities. All to remind you that they care more passionately, think more deeply and google shit more often than lowly pathetic YOU! I remember the good all days when people judged my behavior by the moral standards of their religion. That was annoying, but this is even more maddening. All I can say to all of the movements and the people who worship them, is "suck on this!" It's good for the planet.

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