Before Facebook, we had bumper stickers — and NJ drivers took it too far

If you’re a listener of my show Deminski & Moore on New Jersey 101.5, you may already know of my disdain for bumper stickers. I imagine the person who works late hours in Detroit meticulously designing the body of a car, agonizing over every curve, every line, like God Himself designing the intricate beauty of a woman’s body. Then when it’s finally unveiled, WHAM!, someone slaps a bumper sticker on it that stupidly reads nothing more than WHO FARTED?

Come on. Be better. Do we really need to express every thought to total strangers in traffic?

I saw this guy a few days ago.

Do you think they had enough?

I’ve seen drivers so obsessed with bumper stickers that they run out of room and start going around the sides putting them on the quarter panels.

Then it hit me. Bumper stickers were the original social media. Think about it.

Before Facebook rants, before likes, before your aunt discovered ALL CAPS opinions at 2 a.m., we had bumper stickers.

You didn’t need Wi-Fi, a login, or a profile picture. You just needed a car, a mildly strong opinion, and the willingness to let everyone sitting behind you at a red light know exactly where you stood. Politics, religion, parenting philosophy, questionable humor, it was all fair game slapped right there between your rust spot and your dented trunk.

It was the ultimate “post and drive.”

You want engagement? Try merging onto Route 9 with a controversial bumper sticker. That’s real-time feedback. Horn honks were the original likes. Amirite? Tailgating? That was your comment section, and it got heated fast.

And those goofy, dumb joke stickers? Absolutely the original memes.

“Gas or grass, nobody rides for free.”

“If you can read this, you’re too close.”

“My kid beat up your honor student.”

Tell me that’s not the 1980s version of something you’d scroll past today and either barely chuckle at, roll your eyes, or immediately send to a friend. Short, punchy, sometimes clever, sometimes painfully not, but always trying to get a reaction in about two seconds flat.

The big difference? Commitment.

You didn’t just post it and forget about it. You physically stuck that opinion onto your vehicle and drove it around town for maybe years. No deleting it when it aged badly. No editing after the backlash. That take was riding with you to ShopRite, to work, to your kid’s soccer game, everywhere.

And just like today’s social media…some of those takes really should’ve stayed private.

Opinions expressed in the post above are those of New Jersey 101.5 talk show host Jeff Deminski only.

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