You know those perfect homes? With those perfect lawns? Owned by Mr. Suburb? The guy who has his own riding mower and tiller and owns every other piece of lawn equipment ever manufactured? The guy whose lawn looks better than the best MLB park?

I’m not that guy.

When you own a home and you’re not that guy, you aim for just not standing out. Maybe your grass isn’t mowed in the coolest crisscross patterns and edged to perfection but at least is mown and it’s green.

Until it isn’t green. Like now.

Here’s what my lawn looks like.

Jeff Deminski photo
Jeff Deminski photo
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No, that’s not an image from the surface of Mars taken by the rover Curiosity. That’s really my lawn.

Horrible, right?

Well, I live in Hunterdon County and I’m in one of the counties that were called upon to voluntarily conserve water.

I’d say I’m earning a gold star.

Jeff Deminski photo
Jeff Deminski photo
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Now Gov. Murphy is calling upon the rest of New Jersey to do the same. Remember in past droughts when these calls became mandatory and you had neighbors ratting out other neighbors for watering lawns? Who knows if it will reach that point.

Meanwhile, the saving grace is everyone’s in the same boat. If you were the only one in the neighborhood whose lawn looked like the desert southwest it would be talked about. But this is going on all over my street, my neighborhood, my county.

Jeff Deminski photo
Jeff Deminski photo
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Now if you’re the guy I’m not, you know, Mr. Suburb, this is probably killing you and I understand. Your lawns are your pride and joy and I admire them. But as much as they look dead to you, they’re not.

New Jersey state geologist Jeff Hoffman says:

“All over New Jersey if you’re not watering your lawn it’s probably brown and dry now. That’s fine. That grass is not dead. It will come back when the rain returns.”

It’s just that Tom Petty had one thing in common with Mr. Suburb. The waiting is the hardest part.

Opinions expressed in the post above are those of New Jersey 101.5 talk show host Jeff Deminski only.

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