Although I don’t know a better way of valuing the incident, a jury in Virginia awarded a man $5,001 for almost drinking coffee spiked with a co-worker’s urine. The man who brought the suit, Michael Utz, who didn’t actually drink the tainted coffee, had been asking for over $700,000. He went to make himself a cup of coffee and smelled a strong scent of urine, so he told his supervisor. They had the coffee tested and it came back positive for urine and fecal matter.

The man who spiked it, James Butler, did it because of some ill will toward Utz. Butler had previously been found guilty of criminal misdemeanor assault for the prank. If Utz didn’t drink it, then why was he entitled to the five thousand dollars? According to the jury, Butler “committed battery upon Michael Utz or put him in reasonable fear of receiving bodily harm.” The news account doesn’t say specifically why Butler targeted Utz.

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