Serial groper? Deminski shares his #metoo moment
Yes, it seems we have a disgusting serial groper in NJ. Princeton police report that on Saturday a woman was near Santander Bank on Nassau Street when a man grabbed her buttocks (can we start saying butt in news stories, please?) in a "very aggressive" manner causing her pants to come partially down. A Hispanic male about 30 years old standing 5 ft. 3 inches is the culprit. Based on description, it seems this may be the same man responsible for many other gropings in the same area dating back to 2015.
Now I'm sure this is something many women have dealt with and I'm not making light of it. It's not boys will be boys but rather jerks will be jerks. And what does a groper exactly get out of it anyway? How does touching someone who doesn't want it feel even slightly good to them?
Well I'm here to tell you my dark secret. This is my #metoo moment. I too was once the victim of a buttocks grab. It happened back in 9th grade, on a field trip to Washington, D.C. I know what you're thinking. Why would he bring it up now? All these years later? What's he after? Money? Some twisted fame? Hey, I just want to tell my story. My truth.
It was in the middle of our field trip, possibly outside the Smithsonian or perhaps it was when we were getting back on the bus outside the Mint. Anyway, the bus was 50% full as I was making my way down the aisle toward the rear (man, did I actually just say rear?)... toward my seat when it happened. I was passing a row with three girls on my left. A blond, a redhead and a brunette. Like Neapolitan ice cream. I saw from the corner of my eye some sort of secretive conversation. Little did I know they were plotting something. As I passed, next thing I knew there were fingers firmly on my left buttock. It's taken me years of therapy and lots of lost sleep to be able to finally talk about this. (Okay, it's taken no therapy at all and I haven't thought about it in the longest time but the serial groper story reminded me of it.) As the fingers firmly took hold I was startled, and they released just before I spun to face my attacker. But all I could see was the back of three heads, brunette, redhead and blond, giggling. So I could never be sure which one did it but I sensed from the movement of a shoulder it had been the redhead. I couldn't very well go to the police. Who would believe my story? All I said was, "Really?" And one of them said, "Yup." And they all laughed again.
Now back to being serious for a moment. Obviously this is not a big deal for a guy, because we don't worry about things like being physically overpowered by a woman. But put yourself in the mind of a woman if you will, who has to live with the constant knowledge that she can be. So when someone does something as stupid and rude as this, the woman is feeling much more vulnerable than the jerk is realizing. If that's what said jerk is hoping for then I have a cave they should go dwell in.
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