Alimony: Is it any wonder marriage rates are declining in NJ? (Opinion)

New Jersey has the second lowest marriage rate in the country behind Maine. We also have the lowest divorce rate in the nation, probably due to the horrendous cost of getting divorced, both financially and emotionally. This is especially true for men. Men do horribly in our divorce courts. Ask any man who has gone through it and you'll want a stiff drink and question the wisdom of ever getting married or even consider the thought of divorce.

If you have kids, the nightmare is magnified ten fold. Unless, of course, you make far less money than your spouse and are devious enough to work the system to your advantage. Take the case of David Thompson of Morris County who divorced in 1995 and was ordered to pay $2,500 a month in alimony. It was taken out of his check every two weeks by Morris County Probation until his retirement in 2010, for a total of $450,000. Nice deal if you're on the other end. Not so much for David. But the probation office wasn't done with him.

Fast forward to just a few months ago, and they want one more payment. He has the proof he doesn't owe it, but that doesn't matter. He's got to go to court, after filing the $50 court fee to plead his case next month. At best it's government incompetence and at worst it's utter disregard and contempt for its citizens, most men. Sadly nobody cares, outside of relatives and close friends of the victims. And that's what these people are, victims.

No one wants to see women and children abandoned and I certainly don't want to see the end of marriage and the family unit. But I've cautioned young people for years that marriage is the worst contract you can sign. I believe in love and devotion. It's a truly beautiful thing to behold. I witness it every week when I see my parents sipping out of two straws from the same glass of water at the diner every Sunday morning, after 67 years of wedded bliss. A happy couple with an intact family is the backbone of our society, but if things go sideways, as they do about half the time, the cost of happiness and freedom, will leave you neither happy or free!

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