What one NJ parent must earn so the other can stay home with kids

Look, you’ve heard every side of the “stay-at-home parent” debate. A child is better off with the stability and attention a stay-at-home parent can give. Yet if it’s a mom who is staying home, you’ve also heard that doesn’t allow a daughter a strong female role model for a career. It’s a highly personal choice, but it’s a choice very few couples can make.

Read More: NJ among most dangerous states for kids to have a cell phone

The reality

The economic reality of living in New Jersey is most couples must have two working parents. If you ever thought it would be nice to have that stay-at-home parent experience for your child have you wondered what the bare minimum would be the working parent would need to earn?

According to an in-depth SmartAsset analysis, it’s not pocket change. They broke it down for every state and factored in scrimping and saving wherever a family could. The result is stunning.

The cost

Here in New Jersey a single earner needs to pull in about $89,918 a year just to make it feasible for their partner to stay home and raise a child without paid childcare. That figure, mind you, is for just one child. Not two or three. That’s the magic number SmartAsset’s economists spit out when they balance housing, food, healthcare, transportation, childcare savings, taxes and everyday basics.

For context, that figure puts New Jersey in the Top 10 most expensive states for this lifestyle choice. Hawaii, California and Massachusetts all demand north of $95,000 — and in those places even two incomes tightly budgeted can feel squeezed.

Now take a look and see where the Garden State ranks in the national landscape, state by state.

These figures show the annual income one working parent would need so the other can stay home with one child:

1.    Hawaii — $102,773
2.    California — $97,656
3.    Massachusetts — $97,261
4.    New York — $92,290
5.    Connecticut — $90,542
6.    Washington — $90,459
7.    New Jersey — $89,918
8.    Maryland — $87,651
9.    Colorado — $86,320
10.   New Hampshire — $85,800
11.   Vermont — $85,488
12.   Alaska — $84,594
13.   Arizona — $84,573
14.   Virginia — $84,261
15.   Oregon — $84,074
16.   Rhode Island — $83,346
17.   Utah — $82,410
18.   Idaho — $82,139
19.   Maine — $81,786
20.   Nevada — $81,453
21.   Delaware — $80,600
22.   Pennsylvania — $80,059
23.   Illinois — $79,102
24.   Montana — $79,082
25.   Florida — $78,998
26.   Minnesota — $78,000
27.   Georgia — $77,563
28.   Wyoming — $76,045
29.   North Carolina — $75,608
30.   Tennessee — $75,525
31.   New Mexico — $75,067
32.   Texas — $74,734
33.   Michigan — $74,173
34.   Iowa — $74,006
35.   South Carolina — $73,694
36.   Wisconsin — $73,507
37.   Indiana — $73,320
38.   Louisiana — $73,258
39.   Missouri — $73,174
40.   Kansas — $73,174
41.   Nebraska — $72,966
42.   Alabama — $72,238
43.   South Dakota — $72,218
44.   Ohio — $72,114
45.   Oklahoma — $71,718
46.   North Dakota — $70,949
47.   Kentucky — $70,408
48.   Mississippi — $70,242
49.   Arkansas — $68,141
50.   West Virginia — $68,099

Unless you’re doing extremely well, the stay-at-home parent family doesn’t pan out in New Jersey. According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics for 2023, New Jersey’s average pay is just under $74,000. That falls well short of the magic number.