Men should always pay on the first date, divorce attorney says
A divorce attorney who describes himself as a "the breakup lawyer" on TikTok is racking up some big video views after explaining why men should always pay on the first date.
Justin Lee is known for sharing free relationship advice regularly under the username @jleejd. However, his latest videos about first date etiquette have raised some eyebrows and even sparked a debate on the video-sharing app.
The lawyer's best piece of advice summed up is this: If your date sits and watches the bill come without offering to pay, they have a deep sense of entitlement. Beware.
"Your date, whoever that is, may very well be the person you end up marrying," Lee explains in his video clip. "And trust me when I say, as a divorce lawyer, who you end up marrying is so, so important."
Lee also peels back the curtain, offering viewers a candid peek into the man's perspective when it comes to a first date.
"When us guys take an issue with paying on the first date, the issue isn't tied to the number of dollars we're spending at the end of the day," Lee shares. "And if it is, respectfully, you need to go get a job."
The issue, he says, "is when we end up paying for someone who has this real sense of entitlement. This expectation that we will pay. That's precisely why we need to always pay."
"Let's say at the end of the date, you pull out your wallet, you offer to pay, and your date just sits there, expecting you to pay, as if that is the obvious course of action. In that moment, what did you just learn?" Lee questions.
"You just learned that the person in front of you is entitled and frankly has the audacity to expect a near stranger to pay for them," the lawyer continues. "Just imagine how someone like that will treat their significant other, their spouse. For a low, low, price of $20, $30, $40 or whatever, you learned that the person in front of you does not have the basic courtesy to pretend to offer to pay."
"Therefore, you should never go on another date with them," Lee adds. "And that's why men should always pay on the first date."
Lee's thoughts about first date etiquette have now garnered more than 500,000 views, and while this sounds like somewhat solid advice, some of Lee's followers disagree with his first date guidance.
The self-described "breakup lawyer" shared a second video in response to the debate in his comments section.
"Oh boy, this sparked quite a debate," Lee says in his follow-up clip. "It's not about who actually ends up paying, as much as it is about respecting and appreciating the gesture."
According to Lee, "the issue is when women perceive the payment as an obligation as opposed to a kind gesture. Entitled vs. appreciative. No one owes anybody anything!"
"For the record, this isn't gender specific. Any man or woman who feels entitled in any way toward the other is a walking red flag," Lee concludes his warning.