I Will Never Attend Another Parade For My Favorite Sports Team

I'm a native New Yorker and raised Jersey boy. I have a strong allegiance to the Yankees, Giants, Knicks and Rangers. You could imagine how happy I was on Sunday night when I watched Patriots WR, Wes Welker miss the catch that could have won them the game. In fact, one of my friends informed me that for the last two minutes of the game, I was unintentionally "Tebowing" in front of the television.

Back in 2009, a couple of days after the Yankees beat the Phillies in 6 games to win the World Series, I told myself I had to be at the parade through the Canyon Of Heroes in lower Manhattan. I did, and I'm glad I got to see what it was like, but I will never do it again.

Timeline of events:

4:30am - Woke up and got dressed and headed to pick up two friends.

5:25am - Arrived at the Staten Island Ferry in an attempt to get to the city early to get a good spot for the parade.

7:00am - After a dangerously overcrowded ferry ride and smelly trip on the N train, we finally made it to the parade, bundled up in the 35 degree weather.

9:00am - Despite the fact the parade was 99.9% Yankee fans, the wait for the parade was restless and people began throwing objects from one side of Broadway to the other.

9:03am - I was hit in the eye with someone's half eaten bacon egg n' cheese sandwich that was thrown from across the street.

11:00am - Double-decker buses started making their way down Broadway. No Yankee players in sight.

12:15pm - The floats finally showed up! There they all were. Jeter, Pettitte, Rivera, A-Rod, Jay-Z, Cano... wait, why was Jay-Z there?

12:30pm - The entire roster, front office and group of players' wives/girlfriends/mistresses had passed me by, and I was still wondering where all the hype was. I was still excited from seeing my Yankees win it all, but seeing them 'float' past me was somewhat anti-climactic.

1:45pm - Over one hour after the parade, the streets were still closed and the blockades were removed for convienance. We were still in the same spot we were standing for the parade, although we were looking in a different direction, because we had been trying to walk back to the Subway station this whole time.

2:30pm - Arrived at the Subway, found out the Subway line had been shut down for security reasons.

3:15pm - While attempting to walk from Broadway to the Staten Island Ferry Terminal, we come upon a blockade. Lower Manhattan had been barricaded, again, for security.

5:00pm - Finally managed to maneuver our way to the terminal. We had to walk the length of downtown to the Brooklyn Bridge, then walk back.

5:45pm - At last, we arrived at the terminal, but, not surprisingly, The Ferry had stopped running due to the boat and terminal being over-capacity.

5:55pm - Bought a pretzel from the vendor outside the terminal. (First time we had eaten all day.)

6:45pm - The terminal doors had opened and The Ferry was back in business. Off to Staten Island and my car we go.

Go Yankees!