The many ways New Jerseyans can celebrate International Panic Day
Sure, it’s a mock holiday, but there are plenty of ways the Garden State can honor June 18th’s International Panic Day.
I mean, it’s not like we’re particularly *calm* in New Jersey, that’s not what we’re known for and with good reason.
We have reasons every day to have our blood pressure raised, so June 18th should be no different.
Here are some things that set New Jerseyans over the edge, and should be acknowledged for International Panic Day.
Out of state drivers
The horror of driving in the left lane only to be stuck behind a PA driver for miles is the nightmare of an NJ driver.
Our abundance of potholes
Now that you’ve gotten past the PA driver, best pay attention to the potholes so deep you could swim in them. They’re all over New Jersey roads and they’ll bust up your car until there's nothing left.
Property taxes
I’ll tell you more later on just how bad property taxes are in the Garden State. It’s hard to imagine someone *not* getting anxious thinking about it.
People who think the cast of Jersey Shore are actual New Jerseyans
I don’t know if you remember the horror of being a New Jerseyan in 2010 at the height of the show, but annoying doesn’t begin to describe it.
Most of the cast weren’t even from New Jersey, yet they got to establish our reputation for years.
Paying to go on the beach
This one just gives me a headache. The thought of paying just to enjoy a part of nature seems criminal, but hey, that’s New Jersey!
When the gas attendant takes their sweet time getting to you
You know when you’re in a rush but you need to get gas to get where you’re going? Every second is precious.
So when the attendant is just sitting in the booth or talking on the phone ignoring you it can make your heart rate go up FAST.
The thought of your favorite bagel place going out of business
I’m sweating just thinking about this. When you get accustomed to the way your go-to bagel order is prepared, it’s certainly panic-inducing to have that taken away.
Finding out your friend has never seen The Sopranos
Isn’t that just part of being a New Jerseyan in the 21st century?
Pineapple on a pizza
The thought of ruining a perfectly good pizza like that… the horror.
While you may have plenty of things to worry about on this International Panic Day, I hope you get through it. You’re a New Jerseyan, you’re tough enough.
By the way, remember those property taxes I mentioned earlier? Take a look at just how bad they can be:
Top 20 highest average property tax bills in NJ for 2022
On the opposite end of the coin:
Top 20 lowest property tax towns in NJ in 2022
The post above reflects the thoughts and observations of New Jersey 101.5's Kylie Moore. Any opinions expressed are Kylie's own. You can follow Kylie on Instagram.
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