Stop doing the Jersey Slide before you kill somebody

What a close call. I was on 22 West with my little boys in the backseat over the weekend with traffic surrounding me doing easily 60 mph. I was in the center lane just a bit before the 202/206 interchange.

I saw a blur of silver coming up fast in my passenger side mirror and I just knew it was coming. The Jersey slide.

This one you could call the Reverse Jersey Slide, going from the right lane to the far left, because this stretch of 22 has businesses right in its wide medium. I could just tell the dope was going to do something stupid.

I watched him speed by me on my right only to dart in front of me while hitting his brakes making me hit my own. But that wasn’t the close call. That was the poor guy in the left lane because silver car moron in one fell swoop cut right in front of him and jammed those brakes on much harder. He brought that car in the left lane to a noisy stop, rubber burning into the road and brakes and tires screaming mightily as he tried to not collide.

All of this because the guy in that silver car realized he wanted to go into the driveway for the Buffalo Wild Wings that sat in the median.

I was fine, I saw it coming and it wasn’t that close. But this poor guy in the left lane, man, he almost bit it. Just because this loser didn’t want to go up to that 202/206 interchange and take the cloverleaf to turn around since he wasn’t in proper position. Instead, he did the dreaded Jersey Slide which, honestly, folks, is getting old.

Lanes exist for a reason. 22 West is not the goddamn Pocono Raceway and your desire for a beer and an appetizer doesn’t outweigh the other driver’s desire to live and see his kids grow up.

Speaking of growing up, why don’t you try it? You absolute selfish jackasses that cut from one far lane all the way to your exit across active lanes of traffic really need to be locked up. But let’s not. Instead, we’ll just sit back and laugh when you wrap yourself around that inevitable utility pole. It honestly can’t happen soon enough.

Opinions expressed in the post above are those of New Jersey 101.5 talk show host Jeff Deminski only.

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