‘Twas the night before Murphy, revisited
I wrote this and published it the day before Phil Murphy was inaugurated. He's held office exactly 45 weeks. The reference to a much higher minimum wage is back prominently in the news. The paid sick days has already happened and the free community college gets rolling in weeks. A lot was left out of this poem; sanctuary state, free lawyers and driver's licenses for illegals, a higher gas tax, questionable hires, etc.. As we get close to the end of Murphy's first year in office, how is he doing? Take our poll at the bottom of 'Twas the night before Murphy.
'Twas the night before Murphy
and all through the state
a fear was looming
things wouldn't be great.
Our government bonds
hang by a thin thread
while a downward rating
is what Moody's said.
The voters were nestled all
snug in their beds
while visions of change danced in their heads.
Mama gets no new kerchief
because my salary cap
has turned this Christmas to a pile of crap
All year long there was such a clatter
filled with debates that now do not matter.
On November 7th Phil Murphy had a bash.
He'd won the election with Goldman Sachs cash.
I hoped we would get someone in the know
and not this goon who surely will blow.
A face like a jack-o-lantern with eyes all aglow,
could bring our poor state to a terrible low,
where a minimum wage couple could earn 62,000 a year,
just the uncertainty every small business fears.
Not to mention paid days for all who are sick
no matter if times are thin or are thick.
Republicans stand back shaking heads in shame
While Democrats line up for progressive games
"Now Codey, now Sweeney,
Now Wisniewski and Watson,
On Prieto, On Quijano,
On Burzichelli and Coughlin
To the top of the dome
and to all statehouse walls
We'll tax them to Hell
We'll tax one and all!
When once in awhile we find an eye that is dry
of the tears all the other residents cried,
we'll double our efforts to tax those ones too
because after all it's what Democrats do!"
Forgive me for skewering them in this spoof
but I'm worried my home state will finally go poof.
As I draw in my breath and prepare to stand ground
I'm uncertain Phil Murphy will turn things around.
It seems he's ready to give away the store.
Is this ghosts of politics past or have we not been here before?
He pulls free college out of his pack.
Affording it how? Is this guy on crack?
"Let's shore up our transit, our rails and our ferries,
Don't look at the cost, just look at my merry
outlook when all the while you must know
there's not enough of an economy to grow.
The lies that will fall from my oversized teeth
will give way to New Jersey's funeral wreath
If my promises all seemed a little bit shady
and you hear the warm up of the songstress fat lady,
You can search your own soul and just blame yourself
and place hopes of better days high up on a shelf.
Because you, dear voter, believed what I said
So look in the mirror when Jersey is dead."
I'll speak not a word, I'll still go to work
and somehow try to outlast this jerk.
With bills piling up and a salary froze,
I cannot believe the governor they chose
My words surely make some of you bristle,
go right ahead and give them dismissal.
But I swear I saw him mouth words election night,
"Will the last one to leave Jersey please turn out the light?"
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