Hysterical ’70s and ’80s TV ads from long defunct NJ businesses

Last week I was doing the show with Kylie Moore and we had this strange off-air glitch that involved a commercial randomly playing in what's called an audition channel. (It means you can hear something but it's not going on air.)

What stood out for me was the ShopRite ad was playing the same jingle they've used for years. Decades, actually. The can-can jingle? I'm sure you've heard it.

That little thing sent my mind down a rabbit hole of old jingles and old TV commercials from when I was a kid in the '70s and '80s. That night I hit YouTube and holy smokes, those old commercials were downright laughable. Even worse than I remembered.

Plus so many were for places that no longer exist. So I just had to share a few. I hope this is as nostalgic for you as it was for me.

Action Park

If this ad were honest it would look more like the opening scene from "Saving Private Ryan" but instead it just looks like a good time where kids weren't constantly carted off in ambulances.

Korvettes

A store our fathers and grandfathers loved but apparently we never realized as kids they helped guys get sex! Look at the opening of this 1970s ad where the guy has the lights set low and he's setting up his place to be a love crib for some hot date.

He only now realizes he has no stereo? No matter, Korvettes will rescue him. But with that shirt opened halfway down his chest I'm sure he'd be okay on his own. Line up, ladies!

Sam Goody

Remember record stores? Remember one called Sam Goody? Here's a way too excited '80s girl busting a move for Sam Goody and just because they're selling blank tapes.

Imagine her moves if it were an ad for an '80s hair band!

Gino's

Gino's was a great burger joint. But they had truly lousy TV commercials. This one features Soupy Sales and...I just don't have words.

Sears

Sears, once the largest retailer in America, is all but dead, and they've vanished completely from New Jersey. But how, with such hot fashion as this!?

I was half-expecting the cheesy model to give the Zoolander Blue Steel look.

Bonus Sears

I couldn't resist a bonus Sears ad from the '70s. It's for their optical department and I swear we should be signing in to verify age or something because if this isn't going for a softcore porn feel then I don't know anything.

Crazy Eddie

If you remember Crazy Eddie and his epic fall from grace you definitely recall his screaming over-the-top TV ads that ended with "his prices are INSANE!" But here's one from 1978 that's a little...different.

Kool-Aid

This one's not a store but a product. It's just too funny to not include.

The Kool-Aid pitcher comes crashing through the wall of the bottling alley like a driver from an assisted living center near Lakewood. He manages to not get blown away by the bowling balls as he runs across active lanes but that surely would have made for a better ad.

Then at the end, he apparently plans on leaving by crashing a new hole in the wall.

Opinions expressed in the post above are those of New Jersey 101.5 talk show host Jeff Deminski only.

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