This Movember, take care of that mustache
This Movember, it’s time to grow yourself a sweet lip sweater. A mouthbrow. A tea strainer. We're talking, of course, about mustaches -- the one facial accessory that truly, inarguably makes a man a man.
It’s also time to ask your doctor if a prostate screening is right for you, but that’s a tad more private than your facial hair. This month, you can promote cancer awareness and men's health by not shaving your upper lip -- and you promote good hygiene by keeping that 'stache in check. Here are seven ways to make sure your face stays snuggle-worthy this Movember.
Prepare for It
Before you take the facial hair leap, you need to be prepared. You aren’t some grizzled guy on a four-week hike who’s just stopped shaving and needs nothing but hair follicles and mountain air. You will need products for your well-groomed face. Maybe you’ll just need an electric trimmer to keep things tidy. Maybe you’ll go further down the rabbit hole and need scissors, wax, a comb, clippers or creams for your face fur. This is up to you. The key to a kissable face is knowing what products you need before you need them and having them at the ready.
Growing your mustache is probably the hardest part of Movember (possibly worse than the prostate exam), unless you’re a real manly man, in which case congratulations. You will have to suffer for your facial hair greatness. Your face will itch -- but not forever. You’ll look weird while you’re in the in-between phase as you go from naked face to fuzzy face. Be ready to answer questions.
And then enjoy talking obsessively about what kind of mustache you hope to grow and all the cool stuff you bought in preparation (see the first tip). Maybe carry around pics of different mustaches to hold up to your face to show everyone what it will look like when it’s ready for prime time.
Unless the look you’re going for is “old-timey outlaw” or “facial food particle storage,” trimming your mustache is one of the most important ways to keep the ladies close to your face this Movember. Your trimming schedule should be based on how fast your hair grows and the type of 'stache you’re sporting, but generally you’ll want to trim one or two times a week.
A mustache comb and scissors are your best bet. Along with patience and a steady hand. If you cut too much, all you can do is wait for it to grow back, so take it easy until you get the hang of it.
This may come as a shock to you, but your mustache is hair. And so, your new furry face friend should be treated like hair. That means soap isn’t going to cut it for keeping it clean. You need to shampoo your man fringe a couple of times a week to keep it supple, shiny and smelling nice. Don’t wash it too much because you can dry out your skin, but don’t ignore it either. You’ll smell it -- it’s right there under your nose.
More importantly, your lady friend will smell it, which could spell disaster for any up close and personal contact. While you’re at it, use a hot towel and steam to clean your face under that 'stache. Your skin will thank you.
Indeed a well-trimmed, sweet-smelling mustache will draw women to your face (better than the opposite kind of mustache anyway). But if you really want to keep your S.O. happy while you’re spreading awareness during Movember, you have to keep that Magnum monster soft. One way you can do this is by using a blunt cut to keep your face trimmed. Simply trim the hair evenly along your upper lip.
Beyond that, or if that’s not the kind of style you’re hoping for, you’ll need a conditioner, cream or face balm. You can also use a hot oil treatment on your fall fur once a week to keep it soft and silky. Again, that hot towel and steam procedure will feel good on your face and make your face feel good on your girlfriend’s face.
Here’s where you really get to make Movember your own. You’ve gone through the pain of growing your mustache and you’ve mastered the art of keeping it shiny and smooth. Now you get to have the pleasure of styling your 'stache. There are so many kinds to choose from, and the beauty is, you don’t have to stick with just one. You can change it up. You can go pencil thin. You can go handlebar wide. Make it a Hulk Hogan horseshoe or a noteworthy fu manchu. You could get crazy and make your mustache great by giving it mutton chops or a goatee to hang out with.
You’ve come this far, you might as well go crazy with the style. Make sure you have a good comb and wax, and be ready with a trim if your style starts to get away from you. But have fun. It’s just hair.
The most important thing to remember during Movember (aside from your screening) is that the only way to make your mustache great is to rock it. Whatever style you choose, whatever growth phase you’re in, whichever products you use to keep it awesome, you rock that 'stache. The whole point of Movember is for you to experiment with expressing yourself through facial hair. Enjoy it. Be the most interesting man in your world. Decide that your photo goes next to the word “dapper” in the dictionary. Got a gray spot? Embrace it.
You are a man and your mustache will prove as much. You can make it great by wearing it proudly.