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Pro Choice At The Pump

Gas Pump
(Photo by Cameron Spencer/Getty Images)

It’s baaaack. Back in the news is the contentious issue of self-serve gas in New Jersey. The majority don’t want it. Take a look at Kevin McArdle’s report and the accompanying poll. When I just checked it at the time of this writing, 63% don’t want self-serve gas in NJ even if it would save them some money. The assertions made by State Sen. Jeff Van Drew, who is offering new legislation which we don’t need simply to bolster the argument AGAINST self-serve gas, are ridiculous. Such as protecting the health and safety of New Jersey residents. Has he not seen Mythbusters? Does he actually believe people have been exploding at the pumps? The rest of the country seems to handle the safety aspect just fine. So my only conclusion is Sen. Van Drew must assume you to be all incapable morons. Then there’s protecting the needs of people with disabilities who can’t hop out and easily pump their own gas. That’s where choice comes in. Leave an one island open and one attendant on duty for full serve. And you know what? Forget the concept of keeping one island for full serve.

Since we apparently live in the land of prima donnas afraid to touch a gas nozzle, keep only one island for self-serve instead. Hide it away behind the building for all I care. In fact forget saving me money. Charge me three cents MORE per gallon and I’ll STILL choose self-serve, because my time is more valuable. And I’m sick of wasting it on attendants who barely speak english eventually getting around to me. The language barrier means I can’t even get into a good argument with them over their often sloth like response time. Oh, and the money itself? Van Drew points out how in states where they went to self-serve the price drops at first, but then gas prices rise again. Yeah, no kidding Van Drew. They always rise. Remember how gas was two dollars a gallon in the 90’s? Remember how it was one dollar a gallon in the 80’s? If America had preserved these obsolete jobs coast to coast and not gone to self-serve do you think we’d still be paying a dollar a gallon? I’m pro choice on this. Give me the right to pump my own damn gas. And you can take the nozzle when you can pry it from my cold, dead fingers.

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