This is the week when I offend most Americans. When it comes up in conversation that the typical Thanksgiving spread is filled with foods I hate I am looked upon like Satan. Can't I love America without loving cold, dried out turkey? Large family gatherings lead to taking forever to get organized after carving the bird and even longer for everyone to find a seat. By the time turkey is served it has usually been sitting long enough to get cold, dry, and nasty. I can't tell you how many Thanksgivings I swallowed turkey the way you'd swallow medicine. Because you have to. You can't be a bad guest.

Then there's the cranberry sauce. Who's idea was it that this bitter tasting gelatinous goo was meant for human consumption? I think Play-Doh might be better. And to see it jiggling and swimming in its own fetid juices, no way.

Gravy. Yes, I am an American who does not like gravy. Go ahead. Try to have me deported.

I cannot be the only one. There must be others who would rather have a cheesesteak thank a turkey dinner. I'm listing typical Thanksgiving Day food and I ask that you pick the one that is the most overrated. In other words the worst. There. I said it. Call me Satan.

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