There's nothing to fear but fear itself, and maybe getting a toe ring. My fiancee, who never wore a toe ring before, got one this weekend and she was freaking out ahead of time. What you have to know is she has tattoos and is no stranger to the pain of a needle putting ink under her skin. She also has had piercings such as a navel piercing. So imagine my confusion as we head over to this booth at a flea market in Pennsylvania where a lady does custom fitted toe rings and my girlfriend is practically hyperventilating.

The process is as easy a spraying Windex (yes, believe it or not it was Windex) onto a woman's toe, eyeballing what size she would be, then slipping the toe ring tightly onto the toe. Nothing is pierced. Nothing is poked. You'd think she was about to have a spinal tap. It took her two full days to finally tell me this morning what had been going on in her head. Apparently she was somehow convinced the wrong size toe ring would be chosen, then put on with such force that it would catch the toenail and rip it off from the nail bed in a sudden shower of blood. Yep. That's my girl.

She chose this design which the woman explained was a ring of leaves that is traditional for a bride to wear at a Hawaiian wedding. No idea if that's even true, but now she considers it a second engagement ring for her toe. If I'd known that would have sufficed I could have saved a lot of money!