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An Open Letter To Bambi In New Jersey

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(flickr/moniquem38 photo)

Dear Mr. Bambi and Mrs. Bambi-wannabe:

While we, the drivers of New Jersey, are giving thanks according to our calendar (and the turkey isn’t), I realize that you are basically giving thanks for each other according to ”Mother Nature’s” calendar. 

We humans are voyeurs in the midst of your rutting season.  You’re feeling frisky.  Good for you.  Have fun!  The problem is that maybe you’re a bit distracted, and maybe you…or one of your friends and family…is not thinking everything through before doing something…um…stupid.

Case in point, one of your rut-mates decided to run out in front of me the other night while I was driving home from the radio station.  Thankfully, I wasn’t distracted, and I was the only car on that stretch of highway  So, after causing me a heart attack, your pal got to run off and rejoin the genepool.

I don’t know, maybe its me, but the automobile has been around for about 100 years. Thats a lot of rutting seasons. Shouldn’t you instinctively realize by now that if you challenge a car or a truck, you’re not going to like the outcome?  I hope my words will cause you (and your family) to stop and think before taking up the challenge again.

As my friend Jim Gearhart has said on a few occasions: “Please practice safe rut.” To that I would ask that you practice SMART rut, too.  Your majestic descendents, and our vehicles (and auto insurance rates) depend on it.

Your thoughtful, human pal,

Craig Allen

P.S. Please don’t be mad at me for enjoying some venison the other night!

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