Because there is a new trend to become the gender that you “identify” with as opposed to the gender you were assigned at birth, life is becoming very easy for the gender – confused. A new law would allow you to change your gender on your birth certificate without even having to have the hassle of reassignment surgery. No muss, no fuss. Just deciding which gender you “identify” as, send in a form and there is no surgery involved.

But there are so many things that I could benefit from if I could simply fill out a form and change my identity. This is going to make life so simple! Follow my lead and you can come up with your own ideas!

Height: well I feel like I’m 5’11,” so I should be able to be a runway model... I feel 7’1” so I should be able to play for the NBA.

Age: I feel like I am 55+, so I should be able to buy a home in a 55+ community

Senior Status: I identify as a senior citizen, so therefore I should be I should qualify for Social Security!

Health: I identify as a permanently disabled person so why can I not stay home and collect disability?

Military Experience: I identify as a military veteran so why should I not qualify for all the benefits that veterans are eligible for!?!

Criminal History: even though I am a criminal I identify as a law-abiding citizen so why is it so hard for me to get a job? I’ll just check the box that says “no criminal history” and voila! I’m hired!!

Wow! This is going to make a life so uncomplicated!!!

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