25 thoughts New Jerseyans have while eating at diners
If you live in New Jersey, chances are you've been to a diner. Maybe even several over the course of your life.
You may not realize it, but there's more to eating at a diner than just sitting down and ordering food. In fact, there's basically a whole mentality — a steady stream of consciousness — that begins the moment you park your car outside.
Continuing our earlier discussion about the closing of the historic Geets Diner in Williamstown, here are a few thoughts you've probably had at some point when grabbing a bite to eat at a NJ diner.
1. Scored a parking spot right near the door...sweet! Oh man, now those people sitting by the window are gonna watch me walk in. Ugh.
2. Table or booth? Table! Wait....booth! Good choice.
3. Ten minutes later: The people behind me are sooo loud, and I'm pretty sure the 3-year-old is plotting to dump his sippy cup on my head.
4. What do I want to drink? The waitress is gonna ask me any minute. I'm not prepared for this! *sigh* I guess I'll have a diet Coke...ya know, 'cause it's "healthy."
5. Why is this menu sticky?
6. Should I get breakfast for dinner? People still do that, right?
7. What exactly is a Happy Waitress? Which waitress is the happy one?
8. I hate being the first to order. What if everyone else gets something that looks better than what I ordered?
8. There are like, six pages of options and I still have no clue what I want. Why was I cursed with the inability to make quick decisions? I know, I'll get a nice, healthy salad!
9. Five minutes later: I'll have a bacon cheeseburger deluxe and fries with cheese and gravy...on the side. (It's totally fine, since I ordered a diet Coke).
10. Probably should've ordered a salad. This means I have to go to the gym tomorrow.
11. Hey, what did THAT lady order? OMG it looks amazing. I don't remember seeing that on the menu!
12. It's been exactly 5 minutes and 20 seconds since we ordered. How the heck long does it take to cook a cheeseburger?! I'll eat the ice from my soda. That should curb my appetite.
13. I know, I'll go to the bathroom. It always makes the food come faster.
14. Seriously, why are these stalls so tiny? They're probably made for the people who actually ordered the damn salad.
15. Oooh, the jukebox on my table has "Born to Run"...and if the people behind me hadn't started playing "Paradise by the Dashboard Lights" for the second time in a row, I might be able to listen to it. Meh.
16. Finally, the food is here. Ok, this looks yummy. No regrets.
17. Why do the servers wait until you've taken a huge bite of food to ask you if everything is okay? They must train them to do that. Bet they're having a good laugh about it right now.
18. Forget the mouthful of food, I should've asked for another diet Coke. Now I'll never get the server's attention.
19. Should I finish this whole burger or bring half home? I mean, I'm just gonna eat the rest later anyway. No one else is finishing their food. To-go box it is!
20. I will not order dessert....I will NOT order dessert. Why do those deserts always looks so good behind the glass?
21. *Walking out past the display case of desserts* I should've ordered dessert.
22. How do all diners seem to have an endless supply of mints and toothpicks? Does anyone even eat the mints or are they the same ones that were here in like, 1996?
23. I knew it! Those people by the window are watching me get back into my car. Judging me.
24. I am sooooo full.
25. Two miles down the road: Oooh look, Dairy Queen!
Toniann Antonelli is a social content producer for NJ 101.5. She can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org, or on Twitter @ToniRadio1015.
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